Testimony time

It's testimony time on the blog again. Testimonies are awesome and I absolutely love hearing about how God powerfully moves and transforms lives. It is wonderful to hear about God's enduring mercy and love. Today's testimony comes courtesy of the lovely Jules. I stumbled across her on twitter after someone retweeted one of her blog posts which immediately caught my eye. I began following her on twitter and after reading her fantastic blog I swiftly began following her there too. (Click here for Jules' blog). I found I had a lot in common with Jules, especially in terms of how we viewed God as we were growing up. 

Even though we have never met, Jules' relationship with Christ is a real inspiration to me and I truly look forward to her blog posts where I can read about all the amazing things God is doing in her and her family's life. I could keep talking about how great Jules is, but I'll hand over to her and her awesome testimony.

My Story

It’s an honour to be asked to share my testimony with you. Testimonies are such a great way of sharing the love of God. After all anyone can argue about the truth of the Bible, or whether God exists and all, but it’s much harder to argue with someone's personal experience. And it’s all the disciples and early believers had to share with others - their own personal experience.

So, I was brought up in a Christian family. From a young age we went to church and Sunday School. I was baptised and later confirmed. When I was about 16 I started going to a youth group with a friend at another church and I think this was the beginning of my true journey with God, I mean I certainly had questions and I wanted to know more about God (although the boys at the youth group had a certain pull too and in fact one of them is now my husband…!)

So this was great for a while until I did the typical teenage thing of ‘going off the rails’ and got into all sorts of things that I am not particularly proud of. Although that said, We are all the sum of our lives so far and I know the things I went though in those years have made me the person I am today. And you know, if I hadn’t been there maybe I wouldn’t now be truly following God.

So, anyway, I was pretty desperate to get away from home and so I went travelling. Although God was often in the back of my mind I pretty much ignored him during this time. I did lots of very stupid things (drink, drugs, sleeping with people, generally being very careless and foolish) and looking back it makes me shudder to think of the path I was on. I don’t want to make it seem worse than it was, I wasn’t an addict and certainly wasn’t at deaths door but I was on a destructive path, I didn’t really care about myself. I was very insecure and had issues with not eating too, which didn’t help. So to cut this long part of the story short, I ended up pregnant, a long way from home with a man that was certainly not father material. Despite my situation I knew I could not have an abortion, I just wouldn’t even consider it – from the very second I found out I was pregnant I knew I would have the child. Looking back I think that it was meant to be, and considering the many factors surrounding both our relationship and how we lived, it is literally a miracle I even got pregnant and a miracle the baby was born healthy and happy. (not that I’m suggesting there was any divine conception, that was simply my own mistake...!)

I actually ended up coming back to the UK and settling near my family, who despite initial reservations (that’s a bit of an understatement…) were very supportive. I started to go back to church and actually got involved a bit with it, everyone there was very helpful and lovely. But still, I think I went more out of habit than because of a true relationship with Jesus.

A few years later I got together with an old friend (from that youth group), we fell in love, subsequently got married and had more kids. We continued at the same church and even got involved helping out some more, but my heart wasn’t in it and we rarely, if ever, talked about our faith. As I look back I’m not sure why or what I even believed over this time – I think I had some small measure of faith then but I was and continued to be plagued by doubts.

So finally, about 5 years ago I made the decision to stop going to church. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I had been confused for so long and the final straw was the thought that my children would go through the same as me – constantly wondering whether God was real or what to believe. That had plagued my life and I didn’t want them to go through that too.

On top of that we were actually going through a really tough time in our relationship too. That year was not a good year for us! I felt we were drifting apart, I couldn’t see us apart but we certainly weren’t together. Neither of us could see any way out of the situation unless something changed, and yet nothing could change. I had also been going to yoga for about 10 years and after effectively ‘giving up’ on a Christian God I started to ask my yoga teacher about going on Buddhist retreats, doing meditations etc, generally I guess I was looking for answers elsewhere. I began to embrace this and having always thought of myself as a ‘bit bohemian’ and being rather arty I felt comfortable that it fitted with me and my lifestyle.

…and that is when God showed up!

At this time we were planning an extension on our house and we became friendly with most of the builders, one in particular. I remember one day him saying he would tell me his story when we had time. A few days later (and the timing was totally lousy – the house was really at its worst point with stuff everywhere, my son was ill, I was due to leave imminently to drop him at my mums etc) he started sharing his testimony with me.

It’s fair to say, this changed my life. It was totally full on, right from the word go. I had never heard this kind of Christian testimony before, a real warts and all approach with such amazing experiences. I was completely blown away. Over the next few days and weeks he spoke to me more about his faith and what he had experienced. Some of it was really hard to believe, real ‘supernatural’ stuff and talk of Satan, the force of evil, demons and so on. In all the years I had been to church I had never heard anything vaguely approaching this. I wasn’t even sure I believed in hell. But I needed to hear this – My approach to anything in life is not to do anything by halves, I want to know everything about a subject and I do things with my all. Now, I was totally overwhelmed but couldn’t get enough at the same time. Prior to this I was one of those who thought that if I lived a good life and did the ‘right’ thing I would be going to heaven. How wrong I was! I didn’t even really know that the only way to God was through Jesus. I had always been confused about God/Jesus/The Holy Spirit and all I needed was someone to explain it to me really!

Anyway I can’t remember how long this went on for (but a few weeks I guess) and I gradually started asking more questions – things I had always had difficulty with or things I wanted to ask more about. I know at times I must have been a right pain in the butt, just asking all these questions, often not accepting his answers and disputing things, but during this time a few things started to happen to make me think more about it all and there were way too many ‘coincidences’ for me not to believe. Eventually he just said to me ‘I think we should pray together’ and that’s when I said the Sinners Prayer (a dedicating of ones life to God) on 16th December and gave my life to Jesus, surrounded by building chaos, screaming kids and the clutter of life – but it was perfect – that is what my life is like anyway and God knows that! Then the very next day I led my husband in the sinners prayer too, and shortly after that we started attending a local church – but this time one that is perfect for us. At the time I wrote this:

‘I know that I am saved. That I am starting a relationship with God, that I have a new life, I am reborn. I don’t recognise myself most of the time but it is the most awesome feeling! I know that my life has purpose, in fact I almost feel a bit smug some days that I know this great secret that others don’t know. I wish everyone could know it, if only it were so simple…’

And the thing is, it IS simple! And amazing and wonderful and transforming and overwhelming, and sometimes hard, but I hope I will never look back, never walk any other path than this one because it is absolutely the best!

The 'MGW' assignment - week 9 - Isaiah 53:5

Happy Sunday everyone, hope you are all well. As you may have noticed I haven't been posting the memory verses on the blog each week as intended. Too much going on and too little time. To be honest it's not only that, I'm finding that social media, if you are not careful, can very quickly eat into a lot of your time, and before you know it your blogging, tweeting and pinning more than you're reading your Bible, praying or helping those in need right in front of you and that ain't good!! I'm trying to get the balance right by seeking God FIRST before and above everything. Pray for me. If you follow me on Instagram I have been posting the verses every week there so if you want to catch up on previous scriptures just pop over to my IG page. You can click on any of the IG pictures in the side bar on the right, and it will take you to the page.

So let's get to it. This week's memory verse as with all of God's word is powerful. The Holy Spirit laid this verse heavily on my heart in the early hours of this morning, so here it is. Isaiah 53:5 is a scripture which reveals what Jesus Christ overcame when He sacrificed Himself for us.

Jesus Christ is our Way Maker, He is our Intercessor, our Redeemer, our Healer. Without Him making the sacrifice of shedding His innocent, precious blood on the cross there was no way of us sinners being reconciled with God, our Heavenly Father. He who bore no sin was beaten, spat upon, humiliated and murdered in the worst way possible so that we could be cleansed of our sin and have eternal life with Him in Heaven, if we accept Him as our personal Lord and saviour, which is precisely what He is.

He died on Calvary's cross for our transgressions, for our iniquities, for our inability to right the wrongs, which began in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. He bore the brunt of all of it for all our sakes. He was whipped with a lead tipped rope. His flesh was torn apart and by His very wounds, His very suffering WE ARE HEALED!! There is POWER IN THE BLOOD OF JESUS to break every chain of bondage, oppression, sickness, weakness, depression, addiction, anger, frustration, manipulation, self pity. Whatever stronghold is destroying your life, Jesus Christ can deliver you. Let Him into your life, into your heart and see how He transforms you.

Phew....I need to get my praise on!! Hallelujah Jesus!!! Holy Ghost power people. It is REAL. As always meditate on this verse in the morning and before bed and throughout the day if you can. I would also encourage you to read the whole of Isaiah chapter 53. It is mind blowing. This is in addition to your daily prayer time and communion with The Lord. Please feel free to comment so we can fellowship. Have a blessed week.

Friday reflection - Things are getting real around here...

Hello everybody,

Well what can I say? A LOT has been going down. The Mr and I were at the registry office this morning giving our notice of marriage...yes it's all go, and we've confirmed the date and venue. Whoopeeeee!! The way the sun was beaming down this morning after the appointment, made me feel so blessed to be alive. I know the good Lord is shining His face on us and we are walking the path He wants us to walk. I know it's not always going to be easy, nothing in life is, but when I am weak He is strong. He has already proved this to me time and time again. Glory to God!!

We're getting married in mid April, not the end of March (as we thought last week), to be honest that is much better even though there's only a few weeks in it. So the date is Friday 12 April 2013 and it's all go, Go, GO!! 8 weeks TODAY!!! Ooooweeeeee!!

As mentioned last week, I had my first dress fitting which went really well. The seamstress is great. I've got a second fitting next Saturday, by which time I'll have to have my shoes. I saw a lovely pair last night at Westfield when Alex and I went out for a meal, but alas they were too small. The price was perfect but the hobbling after a minute on my feet was not... lol.

We tried on rings too that was VERY exciting. Alex isn't really a jewellery wearing type of guy but the ring looked amazing on his hand. This is all beginning to feel so real. I'm still in awe of how things have turned around at the speed they have, in the way they have. Seriously when God says something IT GETS DONE, and not in our time but HIS. Favor, favor, favor, Glory, glory, glory.

As the picture above says an AWESOME God deserves an AWESOME praise and let me tell you if you begin to take your walk with Him seriously your mind will be blown by the faithfulness He will show you. Praise Him forever!!

Doesn't the ring look gorgeous on his hand?
I loved mine too. So delicate.
Need to try on again with my engagement ring.

Friday reflections - dress fitting tomorrow!

source

Phew....what a difference a few weeks make. This time last month I was a few weeks into the separation from my OH and today, on Friday 8th February 2013, we are on the verge of confirming our March 2013 wedding date. Who but Jesus could work such wonders? Our parents are meeting tomorrow to discuss all the details and I have my first dress fitting tomorrow too.....wooHOOOOOO!!

This morning I dropped my girls off to school and scooted off to my local town centre to see if I could get some bridal underwear. Apparently you have to wear the lingerie you will be wearing on the day, as well as the shoes you plan to wear, so the dress can be altered accurately. Thank God for Marks and Spencer is all I can say because I was in such a rush I didn't really have time to go to a lot of places, so in faith I went to M&S and I found precisely what I was looking for. A lovely attendant fitted me to double check my size (34B)...and fortunately I had a picture of my dress, so she was able to give her opinion on whether she thought the bra I chose was suitable. As soon as I picked it up I knew it was the one, and when I tried it on my thoughts were confirmed. It fit perfectly and gave me a nice shape (believe me I need all the help I can get after three kids and losing a bit of weight LOL). To add an extra layer of blessing into the mix, M&S currently have an offer where if you have a bra fitting with one of their attendants and spend over £30 on lingerie you get £5 off. I qualified for that, so I got the discount which came in super handy.

It really is all go. We've got our girls dresses and our son's suit to buy (not to mention a TON of other things), but I have seen outfits in Monsoon, M&S, John Lewis and Next which I think would work really well, the OH and I just need to confirm our colours/theme. I may even stick with the dresses I bought for the girls from Mini Mode last summer, but something tells me they lack the WOW factor...hmmmm.

The one thing I'm missing for tomorrow's fitting are my shoes. I didn't really want to rush that purchase, and I have to pick up my youngest daughter from pre-school by 11.40 am, so I think I'll just take some heels that I already have, at least that will give the seamstress an idea of height. My, My, my...I can't quite believe things are starting to fall into place the way they are. I will begin to feel more at ease when we have the date booked, but that will be in a matter of hours and anyway that is not for me to worry about because God has it all under control. Just look where He has brought me thus far?? Praise Him!!

There's something I have to tell you...

...The Mr and I are getting married.....NEXT MONTH!! Can I get a Hallelujah and an Amen? God is so good. I'm probably being a little hasty, but I can't hold it in any longer. There's so much I have to tell you all and so much I have to do. I'm a massive ball of nervous energy aka STRESS and excitement. I'm keeping this post short and sweet but promise to keep you all in the loop.....watch this space.