Sick Mummy, busy Mummy

Hey guys, it's been a while hasn't it? Since I started blogging nearly nine months ago I think this is the longest I've gone without writing a post.

Things have been busy I must say, I've been writing articles for Nu People Magazine, getting my girls ready to start school and pre-school next week *weeps*, going on various days out and weekends away to make the most of the handful of free days left with the girls (will fill you all in soon), then to top it all off I was really ill a few days ago. Sore throat, hot eyes, aches, shivers, no appetite, weak..... I could go on.

If you're a mum you'll understand that despite feeling completely rubbish there is no getting away from mummy duties. I lay on the couch in agony for a few hours, took some painkillers then got on with looking after my children. It was a tough few days, but God is good and I'm still here to tell the tale.

Hope all you lovely readers are well and good. I'm off to buy my eldest her school shoes now. Panic buying at its best.

Mama, Mama, Mama

......yep that's what my 14 month old started saying four days ago. It took him a while but now he's started they'll be no going back.

'Mama, Mama, Mama'.

Music to my ears....

Geek

I've yet to decide whether it's motherhood or simply getting older that has turned me into a bit of a nerd.

When it comes to certain items in my life, I have noticed that I have grown to love things I previously wouldn't have batted an eyelid.

Take the humble flask for instance. This is something I obviously knew existed but it never really had any purpose in my life. Nowadays I can't quite fathom how I ever survived before I owned one. My poor daughters had to suffer luke warm or even stone cold bottles of milk that had been made hours ago as I juggled babies and errands. Now, since I discovered the flask for myself, my son isn't subjected to the same fate as his sisters. He gets fresh, warm; sometimes even hot bottles of milk on the go. I feel like such a good Mummy now. Thanks Thermos.

The next item I'm in love with is the Cooler Bag. Picnicking and days out have never been so enjoyable now I'm able to keep everything crisp and cold on even the hottest of days. Not to mention the little reusable ice packs you can keep in your freezer and place in your cooler bag to keep it extra cold. Genius.

Lastly, I've just acquired a portable hard drive 1TB (that's 500Gb x 2 - woo hoo). It has the capacity to store over 100,000 photo's!!!! My goodness that little block gets my little heart skipping with joy. For years I've been rubbish at sorting out photos and making space on memory cards and sim cards and phones and laptops. It got so bad that our camera has been abandoned for months, maybe even years because we filled up the memory card and couldn't find a replacement for it. It's only thanks to the good old iPhone that we've been able to capture our children and their precious moments. So that'll be my task over the coming weeks. Freeing up space on my iPhone and laptop, so they'll run faster and I can focus on capturing and archiving more precious moments from my life.

What items bring out the geek in you?

Crossroads and confessions

Since becoming renewed in my faith a few weeks ago. It has been made painfully obvious to me there is an area in my personal arrangement which needs to be reconciled before I can move on in confidence with my life as a Christian.

You see, I am not married to the father of my three children. We live together as man and wife and we do everything that a man and wife do (well we haven't been doing 'that' since I've begun to grow more spiritually). But anyway, my thing is this. I want to be married much sooner rather than later.

I have begun to see things a whole lot clearer now and really, what on Earth are we actually waiting for? We have three children and nearly eight years of togetherness under our belt. The money situation or lack of, (where a wedding is concerned) always has and always will be there. I am convinced it will only be an issue if we allow it to be.

If I had my way we'd be married tomorrow, just us two and our kids, but the OH is not so sure. He believes in God and is also a Christian but he is not where I am on his Christian journey. He thinks I'm only rushing things because of my renewed faith and no longer wanting to live in sin. He would be right, but I really don't see the problem. We have been planning to get married anyway right? Maybe it goes deeper still....

If I'm really honest it's the whole sex, I mean intimacy thing that bothers me the most. In the Bible fornication is not pleasing to God (1Cor 6:18-20). I have always known this in a roundabout way, but never seemed to think it applied to me. Huh? I was never truly conscious of it, I think is what I'm trying to say.

As I begin to read more and more of the Bible I wonder why I never used to take this more seriously before now. What have I been doing all this time? I know I was embarrassed about my situation especially after baby number two and three came along and we still weren't married, but I just pushed it all to the back of my mind. I hid from it. Before I was more into pleasing myself. Now I understand the brevity of life on this Earth and I want with all my heart to spend my remaining years pleasing God. I know there will be trials and tribulations along the way, but His divine grace and glory will carry me through each and every hurdle, just like it always has.

Going back to the intimacy stuff, I am happy to wait until we are married to resume our sex life but I think OH will struggle (or maybe it's me who is already struggling) hence why I want to speed up our nuptials. I guess I want to do this more for him and his 'manly needs' than for me (for the record he's been less persistent than before - God is working) but we are human and he is a man and temptation is sure to come our way at some point. I mean after eight years and three kids there's been a substantial amount of love making that has gone on. To have it stop, just like that is a real test.

All in all this is not something I plan on worrying about I just wanted to put it out there. I know God has a plan for all of us and He will bring me through this crossroad in my life. All I have to do is pray with faith and belief and he will do the rest.

Bedtime

Well. Well. Well. I am chuffed to bits with my little man. At the tender age of 14 months he has begun to tell me when he's ready for bed *air punch.* (Well he can't speak properly yet, but you know, mummy intuition and all that).

I've been noticing for a few days now that he doesn't really like being held anymore when he's going to sleep. So as soon as he starts grizzling I put him in his cot with a bottle and he's well away.

Tonight's bedtime was extra special. I was settling the girls down and he was showing signs of being tired and actually climbed onto his cot. I lifted him in and he snuggled down, but the girls chatting and giggling woke him up, so I took him into the living room with me and gave him a cuddle. Within minutes he fidgeted off of my lap, looked at me and made a sound; 'uu-hh' which spoke volumes. I'm getting accustomed to his little ways of communicating with me. He is babbling and making so many sounds these days, bless him, but the words haven't began to formulate yet.

Anyway he got down off of my lap, made his little sound and looked at me as if to say 'come on Mummy, I'm ready for bed'. So I took his little hand in mine and we walked to his cot. I let go of his hand and stood there. I knew he wanted to get in but I was curious as to what he would do next, without me doing it for him. Well he promptly began to scale his cot so I picked him up and put him in. He snuggled down for a second time and in the blink of an eye he was out like a light. Wow.

It wasn't so long ago I was dreaming about this moment. When I was in the midst of endless interrupted nights. I even blogged about it. ( I would link to that particularly post, but I'm still blogging on my phone. Yaaaawn.) Now here I am on the other side. I knew it would come. Both my girls were the same. At 14 months something clicked and sleeping through the night was something they began to truly understand. There were much more grumblings with them though. My little man has been a little gem.

I love my kids. Even more now sleep has been reintroduced into my life. Yes! Thank the Lord.

Now if only I could get the late night blogging sessions under control. Natch.

Speechless....almost

Several days ago I witnessed something horrible. It is something I know goes on in this world but to encounter it first hand was pretty depressing.

The OH's mum came over for her weekly visit so we took the children to the park. On our way back home we were feeding the ducks and looking for fish in the lake when I noticed a young woman in the far corner of the park close to some weeping willow bushes. She was sitting close to the river bank, slumped over. I thought she had passed out so I alerted my mother in law who went over to investigate as I watched the children. We were concerned, because she seemed lifeless and she had her handbag and other belongings randomly dotted around her.

As we got closer a man, no less than 60 (I say 60 because he was greying quite a bit and just had an elderly way about him. He was probably closer to 70), seemed to walk towards her too. My mother in law spotted him and asked if he thought the young lady was alright. He didn't respond. He simply looked straight ahead, shrugged his shoulders and walked into the bushes behind the 'out of it' young woman. At that point she jolted up, her wig falling off in the process. I would have laughed if what happened next wasn't so disturbing. As she roused from her haze she looked up to where the man had walked and proceeded to follow him into the bushes.

At that moment it clicked and my skin crawled. She must have been a prostitute and the old man her client. It was 3 o'clock in the afternoon. Children were riding around on their bikes and scooters. Mum's, dad's and grandparents were feeding the ducks with their little ones, and not even a stones throw away this seedy little world was unravelling, no longer confined to the latest of nights and earliest of mornings.

It made me feel so sad, helpless and a little bit angry that this woman lives a life where she has to (or is maybe forced) to sell her body. She obviously had some kind of drug habit too. I know it's mostly speculation on my part, but deep down I knew that the situation was an unsavoury one. It was a sorry scene. For the rest of the afternoon there were a whole array of disturbing scenarios that bombarded my thoughts.

Why must the world we live in be like this?

Silent Sunday

Straight talking

A couple of days ago my eldest took it upon herself to comment on my 'big tummy' for the umpteenth time. I was lucky enough to be spared the input from my youngest daughter, usually they are a tag team.

Here's how the conversation or should I say monologue went;

Daughter: 'Mummy why is your tummy big?'

Me: *Awkward silence*

Daughter: 'You don't want to talk about it Mummy? Is that why you're being quiet?'

Me: Laughing manically inside, and utterly impressed with how on the ball my child is. I reluctantly answer 'Yes'.

I have explained to my children (repeatedly) that mummy's tummy is the way it is because I grew them inside of it, but enough is enough, I can do more. Time to reduce the carbs and the sugar and get back to cardio and sit ups, after all that is what I did before children, admittedly things were very different then. Lord help me.

Keep your eyes peeled

This post is to give a word of warning to all the supermarket shoppers out there.

Today I did my weekly shop at Asda. It's my supermarket of choice because I find I get more for my money compared to the likes of Sainsbury's and Tesco et al. I am partial to a Tesco shop every now and then. They do have some good deals and I like the quality, not to mention the club card points.

Anyhow I digress, I went to Asda, I did my shopping and I was drawn to their price cuts. For example Mr Muscle Drain unblocker; was £3.95 now £3.00, El Paso flour tortillas; were £1.68 now £1, Dolmio stir in sauce; was £1.75 now £1 and it goes on.

I was pretty happy with my finds until I got to the checkout and discovered that each product that was supposed to be price cut was still full price at the till. I mentioned the discrepancies to the cashier who didn't have a clue what price each item was meant to be so she was very little help.

I ended up leaving a sizeable amount of items purely out of principle. On the shelves the products were clearly marketed at one price, that's why I put them in my trolley. Then to find out that the prices were much more at the checkout seemed really deceitful to me. Maybe it was a technical glitch, but it still stands that if it wasn't for the super beady eye I've adopted lately where money is concerned, I probably would have missed them all. Not to mention the fact that shopping with three small children is no easy feat and being constantly distracted only just begins to cover it, so I'm really lucky I noticed any of the differences, let alone all of them. I easily saved myself £20, just by telling the cashier to take off all the products that were not the price I'd expected them to be.

To add insult to injury there was another technical glitch when it came to paying so it looks like I've paid for my shopping twice. Grrr. Hopefully it resolves itself and the money gets credited back to my account ASAP.

So the moral of the story is keep your eyes peeled. Price cuts are not always what they seem....

Back track

I take it back. London is by no means empty. I don't know what I was thinking even saying such a thing *slaps wrist*. On Friday, my li'l sis, nephew, my kids and I pootled over to Docklands, despite the completely packed DLR. We had a great time and even went on the Emirates cable cars; which if you are afraid of heights like me, were quite scary - lol (I'll blog about the experience later this week hopefully).

On Saturday the OH and I ventured out to the West End. We passed by the African Bridal Show, but got there quite late, so we weren't able to get the most out of it. We had the kids with us too so we didn't stay long. The highlight was bumping into Nicola from Belle Noir Bride blog. She really is lovely.

So we left the bridal show and hit the town. London was heaving. I suppose the weekend was always going to be chaotic in the city, Olympics or not. It was nice for the children to experience the hustle and bustle though. We squeezed ourselves through Regent Street and made the obligatory visit to Hamley's which the children LOVED as always. We then ventured through Carnaby Street and took a leisurely stroll through the intricate backstreets showing the children the hidden gems of London. (If you're on Instagram you'll see more pics I took on the day.) My feet were burning me by the time we began to head home. But then that's always a sign of a perfect day.

Here are a few pics. No captions I'm afraid. Still blogging on my iPhone......

Empty London

Source

Err...I don't know how to say this because quite frankly it's usually unheard of, but.....London is empty.

I thought that with a certain gargantuan sporting event taking place it would be complete and utter bedlam. I was more than a little concerned that the children and I would be confined to our little corner of East London, but I was very, very wrong. Being in London at this time has been one of the most pleasant, crowd free periods I have ever had the pleasure to experience.

Yesterday evening the OH and I took the kiddies to the park and it was great. No swarms of kids fighting to get on the swings and slides; bliss. *Note to self. More early evening trips to the park*. Afterwards we decided to go for a little drive and grab a quick bite to eat. We went as far as Stratford and stumbled upon the Olympic park. It was positively serene. The architecture is beautiful and the police presence high, however the hustle and bustle we expected was non existent.

It's really bizarre because I envisioned a completely different scenario. Not too long ago greedy landlords and even greedier estate agents, were rubbing their hands together with glee, as they prepared to rent out their properties for truly exorbitant rates, to cash in on Olympic fever. I wonder what they're doing now? And how all this will impact the already struggling economy.

As for me, there are a few events coming up in London that I thought I'd have to miss to avoid all the chaos, but the way things are going I think I'll be in attendance. We'll also make the most of the quiet time and take the kids on some sightseeing trips to see more of this great capital city we live in, maybe even make a cheeky hotel booking for us and the kids to enjoy. Happy days. Every little helps.

What is your experience of London at the moment? Do you think it's strangely serene or is it just me?

Hmmmm

When you pour your heart out all over your blog, it's hard to know what to do next. I did my outpouring yesterday, here. There's a certain vulnerability that follows when you finally pluck up the courage to press publish. You've laid yourself open and bared your soul for all to see.

It's a bit scary and if I'm honest rather uncomfortable but at the same time quite necessary. Well it is for me. I used to think I was a fiercely private person and to a certain degree I believe I still am. But I've come to realise that if what I have to say can encourage, help or uplift just one person then it has to be worth saying.

As well as the deep stuff, I'll continue to blog about any and everything that fills my head. Fluffy, cute kiddie musings in particular. Ha!

After all that's one of the many beautiful reasons we blog right? To share a part of ourselves no matter how light, heavy, funny or difficult the subject matter may be?