A dilemma



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I have a personal dilemma. People with a nervous disposition may want to skip this post now. It's a situation that most people undoubtedly face, so I'd like to share my story because this issue is something I need to get to grips with and pretty quickly, so here goes...

I'm in a quandary about which contraception to use.

There I've said it. (Doesn't feel too strange after all. Lol. ) Anyway after three kids in three and a half years, (two of those completely unplanned) I'm not sure my body or my sanity could survive another child. Don't get me wrong my children are my whole world, but what do you do when you know you're done having children, but you still want to enjoy the other stuff? Obviously we need to take precautions and we are, but I'm searching for something long term that we both can feel comfortable with. Most available options leave me wanting to run for the hills.

It feels absurd to me, because there was a time not long ago, I never even thought I could or would have one child, let alone three and contraception was the furthest thing from our minds. Now here we are blessed with three beautiful children and trying to prevent any more?? I have a very complicated pregnancy history. I have suffered several miscarriages, one at 20 weeks, after which I discovered I had a medical condition (I will go into more detail in a future post). So I guess you could say there is a lot of emotion tied up in this whole process.

Whilst pregnant with our third child. I half joked with the other half that he should get the snip. He refused, saying at 29 he was too young. I guess he has a point, but I don't think he'd do it even if he was 60.

I would not get my tubes tied. I lost an ovary to a cyst nearly 10 years ago so I think I've been through quite enough in that department. Pre kids I was on the pill for about 10 years, I tried to go back on it after each of my children, but every time I'd have horrible mood swings and feel really low. The injection scares me, I'm not scared of needles, but I don't like the idea of being injected with hormones. I've seriously considered the coil but the nurses gave me the eebie jeebies with all the talk of discomfort, and coils potentially getting lost inside you or falling outside of you, plus I don't want all those man made hormones in my body either. I know you can get the copper coil, but the thought of a foreign body sitting inside/close to my womb bothers me.

In each of my pregnancies I suffered from hyperthyroidism so I have a new found appreciation for the human body and how finely tuned it is. Just one little imbalance can send your body haywire, and I think that is what puts me off of most of the family planning options out there, I would love to find a more natural method. Currently we use *ahem* condoms and although they're ok, I'm so scared of them splitting that my paranoia often gets in the way. It's all very crap and rather stressful.

I would like to try the rhythm method. This is when you have intercourse on the days you are least likely to conceive. You have to be super strict and organised to use this method. For most women this wouldn't be an issue, I don't think I could say the same for most men. So realistically that would be a 'no, no' too, but saying that, I'm good at keeping the other half at arms length when needs be. Much to his frustration. He does handle it well though, poor thing, so maybe the rhythm method could work for us?? Maybe??

So that is my dilemma; what contraception should I use? Certainly there is always abstinence, but then I'd no longer have to worry about family planning, because I think I'd be on my own before long. A man (and of course a woman) has needs - haha. So if you dare to share what methods do you use and how does it effect you? Your thoughts and experiences on the matter would be really helpful.

Thanks in advance.